Hybrid
by Kobal
Summary: But she has already seen it. The look on his face, the fear. She hopes he is just as afraid of her rejecting him as she is of him rejecting her. She hopes that is the case. ONESIDED AllenXLenalee, Implied KandaXLenalee, Character death.


**:Hybrid:**

She can't breathe. The teeth squirming into her limbs is enough to rip her windpipe out of her own throat. Helpless in the Earl's clutches she remains there: in pain.

_Why aren't you here?_

Tears spill down her cheeks as she thinks of him dead. Bleeding. Leaking. Crying. Screaming. In all the self-sacrificial glory that was Allen Walker.

All the courage she has is gone now. Her resolve has dissolved. Her hair has burnt. Her useless tears are still ever-present. In all the cowardly glory that was Lenalee Lee.

"Good evening, Earl."

-

"So you love him."

"I…what?"

"You love that stupid beansprout."

"Well – I…"

"Don't do anything stupid."

"Sorry, what?"

"You heard me."

_But you wouldn't listen. _

-

Over and over. She kicks the imprisoning die that keeps her away from what she fears. Her legs are sore. They are cramping and probably bleeding. And it is painful. Not just in her legs, but in her heart. She is once again helpless.

_And he is in so much more pain. _

The two of them are fighting. One trying to kill the other, one trying to save the other. Her screams lose sound in the flood of flames that engulfs them. All she can do is scream louder. And hope that Lavi will hear her, and wake up.

But once again, Allen is the one to save him. He is the one to pull his comrade from the fire and save his life. They are all fighting so hard.

She loves him so much.

_But all she did was scream. _

-

"Brother?"

"Lenalee dear! What happened to your lovely hair!?"

"Brother!"

"Yes, my dear sister?"

"I love Allen."

"Lenalee…"

"Please don't look so sad, Brother."

_Don't make me think this is a bad thing. _

-

There was no one to talk to, she realizes. No one who knows Allen enough to help her. There is no one to reassure her that Allen will love her back. She's still alone.

Even so, when she greets him in the cafeteria, he's smiling that same warm smile he always does. Even though the man behind him follows him constantly, even though rumors of being a Noah have spread throughout the Order. He can still smile.

_She wishes she were that strong._

Her words come out like those of a child: broken and quiet.

He notices something is wrong, and tries to reach out his hand to her. Wrong hand. A quick double-take and he gives her his right hand.

But she has already seen it. The look on his face, the fear. She hopes he is just as afraid of her rejecting him as she is of him rejecting her. She hopes that is the case.

_Apparently it's not._

-

She had once been fearful of the dark. There she didn't have a soul to stand by, no one to hold her hand, or tell her words she wanted to hear. But not now.

Now the dark is her ally. Both working to achieve the same goal.

She had found him, wandering the halls, in search of a midnight snack. He had tried to ask her what she was doing up so late, but she never gave him the chance.

He's against the stone wall, panting and gasping as her lips again crush against his in an attempt to muster all the passion she could.

She's pinning his arms to his sides as she pulled her tongue from his lips, and onto his neck. His tight hands on her elbows are either begging her to stay, or pleading her to go.

_The worst part is, she can't tell. _

Her name is a gasp in his throat she lavishes it with her wet mouth. She can't help but moan as she pushes him harder into the wall, her fingers now crawling through his white hair, loose around his flushed face.

She wants him to realize just how much she loves him. She tries to tell him this with her fingers, lips, tongue…

She's begging him to understand just how much she loves him. How she would die for him – live for him. She remembers Lavi telling her that Allen's a bit too naïve to understand the kind of loves she feels, but she hopes he was wrong.

She finds it funny that he doesn't even know how to kiss. She finds in funny the way he is unsure where to place his hands. She even finds it funny that he can't find anything to say.

She finds it heartbreaking when he finds hidden strength as she reaches for his abdomen and pulls her away. Looking into her amethyst eyes, with his gorgeous and terrified silver, he pleads, "Stop."

-

He can't breathe. The hands around his heart pull tighter as he looks at her.

She's crying over the coffin. Bawling. Screaming. Sobbing. It all sounds the same to him. Her hands knot themselves together as she tries to cling to all she has left.

Komui doesn't dare touch her. He's looking more at Allen as he tries to remember his beloved sister ever crying the way she is now. Inside he wants to hit Allen. He wants to make sure Allen never hurt Lenalee again. But inside, he knows it was wrong.

_Lenalee was wrong. _

Lavi couldn't even stay in the room. He had bellowed cruel things to Lenalee and Allen for letting their hearts get so attached. He now waits outside the room, face in his hands.

Lavi knows Allen won't be able to console Lenalee now. Komui won't because he has never known the kind of love they have. It was a square, a triangle even, or some other wretched hybrid that had been felt to strongly.

But once one person had been taken out, everyone had fallen apart. They're all crying now. Every last one of them. It was stupid to fall in love.

_Bookman was right. _

-

"Allen…"

He feels himself melt the moment she touches his face. He hopes more than anything she won't kiss him.

She brushes her lips against his cheek.

"I miss him."

He knows she's in too much pain to think rationally.

"M-Me too."

She's leaning closer, her hair brushes against his collar bone.

"I-I tried…to protect him…"

"He's not the type to say anything…about _that_ kind of pain."

_The kind no one can stop. _

Tears are spilling down her cheeks as he takes a step back. Away from her. She's so fragile. He's going to regret this: he places a finger on her cheek, and brushes away a tear. He shouldn't be doing this. Kanda would've killed him.

"Thanks," She says, trying not to make eye contact, "for using your left hand."

Allen manages a smile. He doesn't know how reassuring it'll be – coming from him. But it's the best he can do for her.

_It's the only thing he can do for her._

--

**Author's Note: **I was having an unusually strong writer's block this morning. No matter how much I tried, I could not get out the next chapter of TMLKM (abbreviation.) It was then that this idea floated into my head, and I was like, "why not write this instead?" And there you have it. Although this probably isn't much compensation…I was in a heavy anti-Lenalee mood, so it's the best I could do.


End file.
